Why do I feel this way?

I don't know what is going on with me lately.  I don't know if it's because of the holidays or the weather or what, but all I know is I just feel so depressed all I want to do is cry.  My two youngest children have therapy 1-2 times a week and I am supposed to continue it at home the rest of the week.  I will admit I have not had the urge to do any or haven't done any and I feel like I am letting my children down, as they are the only one who suffer.   Also, I haven't been wanting to do any housework or scrap booking or even writing on this blog.  I had to force myself to do this!  I don't even want to play the computer games i.e.-diner dash and I really like playing them.

I am so cold all the time and I know what you're thinking--maybe she needs her thyroid checked.  Well, I have that checked at least 1 time a year--maybe more---family history and a recent goiter found--woowhoo.  I have been having this pain--so intense.  If anyone has ever had a c-section before and remembers the pain afterwards--that is exactly what I am feeling---but all the time.  I am taking a pain medication for it (doctors RX). That seems to help, but lately it's only been making it less severe--when it used to get rid of it completely.  This pain makes is so I can't sneeze, cough, laugh, lay down, sit up or even have the cat sit on me without wincing in pain and holding my abdomen.  I  mean sitting here typing this and I can feel sharp pains all thru my abdomen  area.. I was told by my doctor that I need physical therapy in order to help the pain.  The pain will never go away completely, but with therapy it should get less intense.  I also now have to be followed by the doctor more, because during a cat scan they found a spot on my right lung! Oh can you stand it. When it rains, it pours.

All I want to do is take a nice HOT bath, and go to bed!

My husband has been awesome thru this and I am so worried that I am going to make him want to leave.  I know he says he doesn't want to, but people can only take so much before they throw their hands up.

I just want to feel better, and I want this year to be so much better than past years.  I want to get out of debt, put some money away for savings, lose weight and just have a fun year.

Take The Snow Please.

I will have to admit snow is pretty, especially when it is on a field and there are no foot prints in it.  It looks so calm & peaceful.   However, we (New England) are getting dump on and everything is just a sloppy mess.  It is so hard to drive or just plain get around.  Kids are supposed to go back to school tomorrow after the long holiday break and now they probably will have a snow day!  UGH. 

I just wanted to say Goodbye to 2009 and Happy New Year 2010 to everyone and I hope the new year goes well and we start to see some wonderful turn around for our country and the world.  We need it.

Happy New Year!